Thursday, April 14, 2011

Why I'm never ever ever going to Greenview Restaurant again.

I was taking my niece (she of Marriages and Mercedes) out for lunch with the last dregs of my feeble (but infinitely helpful) salary. Seeing as we all know that the best place to get lots of food for little money is Greenview,that's where we headed. I'm generally snobby about my eating,but as she was picking,I decided to let it pass. Plus I don't like to venture out of my comfort zone. Why now? There's a reason it was established as such in the first place. Change and adapting to change? Overrated. In this sense,anyway,lol.

I've been channeling mild anorexia lately. Seriously,though. I talked to my doctor friend and that's what he says it is;simply defined as loss of appetite. I've lost 4kgs in under a month in VERY INCONVENIENT PLACES. *sigh* Anyway,point is,all I wanted was their amazing mango juice. We ordered and waited.

Two sips later,I thought,hm. This mango juice tastes funny. Gave the niece to try,because usually my tongue has low standards (ha!) so if my tongue was noticing,there was a major problem. She noticed it too. We promptly called the waitress,who switched it for me. Bad move #1. I should've just ordered something else,seeing as all the mango juice was probably corrupted.

Second one was bad too. Surprise! Sent it back and ordered an Alvaro. It was taking ages to come. Niece was halfway through her meal. I called the waitress who I had ordered my drink from. She said she's bringing it. 10 minutes later...nothing. I called her again. She said she'd been ordered not to serve me. By now,a passive aggressive tSN was getting peeved. We called another waitress. She said she'd bring...she didn't. When called back,she said she'd been ordered too. I asked to speak to the supervisor. Who came over with a sulky look on her face. I said,why aren't I being served? She said because the second juice was fine,it had just been made. (please note that we made our waitress taste the second one,and she said it was off) I said that's not the point. I'm the customer,and I don't like it,and we both tasted it along with your waitress and agreed it was off,and I want an Alvaro. She said I can't bring you an Alvaro. I looked at her untrained idiotic face and thought,tSN,it's been a while since you were pissed. I mean,you're anorexic and thus probably secretly hungry,it's early in the morning,AND she's an LSB with an attitude. So I got pissed. I said,the customer is always right. When you bring me bad food,am I supposed to just sit here and eat it? Then she said,no the customer is not always right.

There is something seriously wrong with service in Kenya.

So I yelled,demanded the bill,told her that I would never come to Greenview again. She said fine,still smirking. We walked out after paying the bill. Back to my comfort zone. Never again. The customer is not always right? O.....kay.

Any boycotts on fuel prices I should know about? Any ideas? Are we doing nothing?




  1. well sugar,i tried that once...those people pride themselves in having loyal customers so they really don't care about u.been there for fish fingers,they hoaxed me,never gone back

  2. Thanks for the heads up.

    Just seen your tweet to @safaricomltd. Yeah, product quality/customers' requirement of it is a major issue! Either people don't know their rights or don't really care that much or both.

    One example: Route 15 javs practically extorting cash from commuters for beyond bogus reasons like, i don't know, the weatherman hesitantly implied that it's probable that it could, perhaps, possibly rain depending on the chance that monsoon winds - not entirely from but likely to come from the east if the westerly ones don't come first - in a way, cause it. & they're smug about it. & people still get in.

    On the 'bright' side, it's a capitalist world so the opportunist will always walk away happy; with superprofits.

  3. I say screw anyone who tries to stomp/step or in anyway infringe on your rights. Kwani kuna restaurant ngapi Nairobi? I'd rather spend my money at the molester's establishment if they will give me the kind of service I deserve. Hata Mama Njeri wa kibanda ya mtaani respects her customers. Greenview and other like minded establishments can serve themselves.

  4. But if they keep being douches, and people keep refusin, we can start out own littu movement. :o)

  5. Yeah. People take advantage of people who don't stand up...which is why I think we should all pull a Besigye...

    @Kev YIEEAAAAA BOYYYYY!!!! :o)

  6. I say capitalism hi5! Extort all those who let themselves be extorted! People need to shiba the nonsense service and leave, or just deal with it if they keep returning. If Greenview has mad loyal customers yet they suck, then it's the fault of the people who make it unnecessary for them to try and please their customers. On that note, I may never return to Java, it's never that serious.

  7. Sigh. the case that is this country- i dont even know what to do anymore. other than have blogs about it, telling anyone you know...making it known that if you truly love your toilet habits- Greenview will transform them to watery bowel syndrome...

  8. All the food served in Nairobi WILL kill you. Either painfully or fuck up your skin as the years pass by. Sad that most people will say its smoking, drinking or such shit. It's the food. Greenview, when was the last time you saw anything green in that area...aside from the napkins on the table?

  9. I long gave up on service in Kenya, you get treated like they are doing YOU a favour. I once had a waitress refuse to heat my food claiming that it was 'hot enough' yet it was merely cool. The kind you kula and the oil solidifies on the roof of the mouth. I didn't finish the meal.
    By some strange luck, the resturant was closed a month later :-D

    @ART ''the only green things are the napkins on the table'' muhahaha

  10. Say what!!! Eh eh, hell no! That's a bit much of them, what! Pole babe, but you should have just kept your cool, ordered and not paid or something...apparently if you shout at them, they spit in your food...

  11. Someone has been UN-reading Customer Service for Dummies!

  12. @Antony No kidding. Sigh.

    @Thogi Please. I'm a warrior. I went to a Kenyan boarding school. I have buns - I mean, guts, of steel. Lol.

    @Angani RIGHT??? ARGH.

    @Art Priceless line right there. :o)

    @Marion @Abba I will never go to Greenview anymoremoremore/there's a silly supervisor at the doordoordoor/you heard whatshe said/she clearly needs to get laid/I will never go to Greenview anymoremoremore... :o) JAVA IS MY HOME,ABBA. Slight it not. Hehe. While the service is sometimes lacking, at least if I am dissatified with a meal or the service, my complaints will be heard and I will be adequately compensated. #jussayin

  13. As I was saying....
    I've been to Greenview about 10 times so far. And with good results. No bad food, no bad service. So I can only take your comments and watch out when I'm there next time.

    Every restaurant has it's downfall, even Java. I used to be a die hard Java addict. I knew their menus by heart. I knew exactly what my portion should look like. And I would cause drama when they brought the wrong stuff.
    But you can't beat Savannah... wooi. Kenyatta Avenue branch wins award for worst service. 20 minutes, and no one has brought you the menu. When they do, your food will take another 20 to get there, and lucky you if you get the right order!