Ok so the first time I ever thought Ice T was cool was when I saw him in the Chris Rock documentary, Good Hair. There’s a part they’re talking about how relaxer is creamy crack (lol) and Ice T goes ‘In high school, when I first got relaxer in my hair, it was a measure of how cool you were. In fact, those dudes who was real gangster came to class with rollers in their hair…the yellow ones were less cool coz they meant you had less hair, but the orange ones made you a god. I actually had one mug shot taken in rollers.’
There are quite a number of grown ass men talking about how they had relaxer in their hair, some of them main men of Black history. Reverend Al Sharpton. James Brown (he doesn’t talk about it, obviously, but we see pictures). Ice T (who wasn’t cool….till he admitted in public that he likes girly hair. I’m into truth. Hehe) .This hair shit has gotten to the guys too, right about the same time it got to women. But why the hell is everyone s obsessed with making black hair look – pardon me – white? Because that’s basically what relaxer does. Make it straight instead of nappy. Or kinky. In my world, kinky is a GOOD thing…isn’t it? :o)
I’m female, and even *I* don’t understand the fascination women have with hair. My hair has caused me nothing but pain since my conception. Ok, after the age of 3. I got my hair relaxed when I was 8. And it was in braids for most of the time till I was 12, something that resulted in constant waterworks. We had this vicious hairdresser who made house calls – or maybe I was just tenderheaded – called Zemzem. Doesn’t that just sound like the dude with the saw in a horror movie? Just playing. She was doing her job but DAMN. Years and years of trauma. I can’t even braid my hair anymore.
Women spend so many hours of their lives that they can never get back in a salon. I can’t comprehend it. Which is why when I was 17, I cut my hair. And again when I turned 21. At this rate it’s going to be this length for a while. I‘m thinking of channeling an afro. But I feel blessed that I don’t have to comb it, press it, relax it, treat it, roll it, cover it, dye it, braid it, style it, weave it, crimp it, curl it, flat iron it – in other words, pretty much idolize it – every damn morning. And guess what? I can dance in the rain because it won’t cost me 3k in damage control. Barber, anyone?