Friday, November 1, 2013

Office Polootics 2

You can say all you want to say about Sheldon Cooper, but at least he is honest.

At least you would never think that Sheldon is being disingenuous, or doing something to please other people, or something he didn't want to do...everything about Sheldon is an open and mildly annoying book.

I would never date him, but we could definitely be his friend (if I did not kill him first).

You have to admire a guy who is honest with himself and others aaaall the time. I wish I could do that, especially with my parents, LOL, but this ain't America. Or a sitcom with Vanity Cards at the end. (How much do we love Chuck Lorre??)

Why, if Sheldon was in my office, he would be super unpopular.
I want to be super unpopular!

Let me tell you why.

So this chile in the office is getting married. Whoop de do for you.

So then the office is supposedly required to changia for her.

But...but why?

I don't like weddings. There was a time in the distant past that I did, but now, no. They are like babies - too loud, too expensive, and leave you with debt to your ears. Why do it in the first place? Especially if you can't afford it.

And if you still insist that you want one, si you have a cheap one?

If you can't have a cheap one, Google Maps has the directions to the AGs office, meyyn.

If you have to ask your office mates to help can't afford it.

Also, why are you asking your office mates? Are you an orphan? Do I look like your BFF?

Might I add here that I almost said no to being one of my actual BFFs best maid?
I really don't like weddings.
If someone is NOT your BFF...WHY would you ask them?
Might as well take one to the guy at the duka as well, no?
And the chile at the super...
Don't forget your bank cashier (who probably knows you way better than I is a deep relationship)...

So the office is supposed to take up a section of the budget.
This budget is pretty cheap for a wedding (YAY) but almost 90% is unpaid (boo).
The deadline for pay is halfway through the month.
This wedding is not happening. Unless the office peeps were the first resort.
If the office takes up flowers, from what I saw, that's the only thing that is going to be there.

So then a heifer (not the Bride-Bila-Wedding) is coming around with a sheet. I say I am not giving. She asks me why.

Are you KIDDING me right now?
Are you actually asking me for a reason WHY I am not giving you my money?
Are you my mother/sperm donor/father of my children/the Lord?

You guise...this office. I'ma pull a Sheldon.
Real soon.
Real quick.



  1. Honest, one word that comes to mind!

  2. Wow, people are bold lol. I can't imagine asking anyone that wasn't kin to be donating to my wedding.

  3. Weddings and church contributions. I don't go to your church. I won't enjoy that new PA with you. Shout louder. SHINDWE.

  4. A few months ago I would have been happily jeering at people who solicit for wedding contributions from their coworkers...but a few weeks ago I met a dude who wanted contributions for his ruracio (dowry negotiations). Now that is the clear winner. How now? Is the girl going to be our collective wife? How shameless can you be?

  5. Seriously your articles are heaven to my eyes. They're so real. So that means heaven is real?
    And you an angel or something?